Forum: The name game

By Jenny Green
Canwest News Service

Prime Minister Stephen Harper and wife Laureen wave as they board the Conservative campaign plane - dubbed by journalists “the Sweater Vest-Jet” - in Ottawa September 7. (Chris Wattie/Reuters)

It could be argued that Canadians have had little to smile about during this election. 

There has been anxious talk of a gloomy economy. Some party supporters have had their car brake lines cut. And all the polls say the chances of anyone's chosen party winning a majority are next to nil. 

With days to go before Canadians choose the next government, it's time to bring some fun into Decision 2008. 

How? By exercising your democratic right to poke fun at politicians. 

You might have already read some of the buzzwords going around this campaign. Jack Layton has earned the nickname Taliban Jack. People who don't trust the Liberals call them the Fiberals. And there probably isn't a Canadian following the election who doesn't know that A.B.C. stands for something other than the first three letters of the alphabet. 

Who comes up with these plays-on-words? Well, some of them come from journalists. It's a tradition for reporters covering elections to name the airplane they're travelling on, so, for example, Prime Minister Stephen Harper's plane has been christened The Sweater Vest-Jet. 

Other monikers come from our clever readers in our comments section. We've read things like Always Bet Conservative, challenging Danny Williams' new A.B.C. acronym; and the Liberals' Green Shaft plan, a thumbs-down term for the Liberals' carbon tax plan. 

There have got to be some more zingers out there. We want to see your nicknames and catch-phrases. Post them in the comments section at the bottom of the page. 

They should poke fun of and perhaps also expose a little truth about your favourite – or most detested – politician or political issue. 

And remember, this is all in fun. We're looking for creativity and humour, so it's not enough to just call the Prime Minister a windbag. Puns will make the cut but no profanity will be posted. 

Here are some ideas to get you started: 

• Nickname for the political leaders or candidates
• Funny names for the parties
• A title you'd give to describe Election '08
• A play-on-words to describe the current bickering over which party has the best solution to the economic situation
• A catchy buzzword for the leaders' platforms
• An epithet to describe the ad campaigns
• Remember the puffin story? Why not give that a name?

Here are some examples, past and present, from both sides of the border:  

• A.B.C: Newfoundland and Labrador Premier Danny Williams' official campaign to get people to vote "Anything But Conservative."

• B.M. the P.M.: Nickname for former Prime Minister Brian Mulroney, first coined by morning DJs on Ottawa radio station "The Bear" in the late 1980s.

• Captain Canada: Name given to former Fisheries Minister Brian Tobin became almost a national hero for getting tough with Spain during the so-called turbot war.

• CCRAP: Unfortunate acronym for the Canadian Conservative Reform Alliance Party during the unite-the-right days. The name only stuck for a day before the party realized its mistake.

• Danny Boy: A demeaning nod to former Quebec premier Daniel Johnson Sr.'s Irish roots, who was often the butt of jokes.

• Dubya: One of many of U.S. President George W. Bush's nicknames, in reference to his Texas accent.

• FastCat Fiasco: AKA "Ferrygate," the B.C. Ferries scandal of the 1990s, where a fleet of high speed ferries ended up being hugely over-budget and slower than the ones they were built to replace.

• The Fiberals: First used to deride Dalton McGuinty's Ontario Liberal government which was perceived as breaking a number of election promises. Now also used to describe the Liberal Party of Canada due to of the sponsorship scandal.

• Le Frisé ("Curly"): One of many nicknames given to Quebec premier and former Quebec MP Jean Charest, in reference to his afro from the mid-1990s. He's also known as Patapouf (similar to "Bozo" the clown).

• Fuddle duddle: After Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau was accused of telling the opposition to "f- off" he told the press he had actually said "fuddle duddle," inspiring a whole generation of Canadians to use the expression in jest.

• Giveaway Jack: Name, first given by one of our online readers, to denote Jack Layton's excessive spending.

• Green Shaft: Name a Global News Online reader gave to the Liberals' carbon tax plan, officially known as the Green Shift.

• John McSame: Nickname for U.S. Republican hopeful John McCain, to indicate he's no different than George W. Bush, first heard in Democrat attack ads.

• King Ralph: Former Alberta Premier Ralph Klein earned this nickname because of his long stay in power and autocratic leadership style.

• The little guy from Shawinigan: Jean Chretien liked to refer to himself as a regular guy who came from the town of Shawinigan, Quebec.

• Mr. Dithers: Paul Martin became known by this unflattering name after his persona changed from tough and decisive finance minister to a prime minister who couldn't get anything accomplished.

• Professair: Name given by journalists to Stephane Dion's Election 2008 airplane, in homage to Dion's former life as a university professor.

• Rat Pack: Title given to a several young, up-and-coming Liberal opposition MPs who gave the Conservative government of the mid-1980s a run for its money. Includes Sheila Copps, Brian Tobin, John Nunziata and Don Boudria.

• Shawinigate: Name for a scandal where former Prime Minister Jean Chrétien was accused of conflict-of-interest in his hometown riding of Shawinigan, Quebec. The "gate" suffix" is commonly added to the end of words to denote a scandal, in reference to the famous Watergate scandal, for example, Bingogate, Lewinskygate, etc. Seen as a lazy wordsmith's trick.

• Sheila: Official Conservative Party nickname for the type of female voter the party is wooing this election, described as a suburban mother of two who drives a minivan.

• Super Mario: Mario Dumont, leader of Quebec's official opposition, was compared to a character in a popular videogame because he accomplished so much at such a young age (he was born in 1970.)

• The Sweater Vest-Jet: Stephen Harper's aircraft. A tribute to the Prime Minister's favourite piece of clothing during this campaign.

• Taliban Jack: An epithet given to Jack Layton by those who don't agree with his Afghanistan negotiation and exit-strategy policy.

• Ti-Pet: Lucky Pierre Elliott Trudeau's initials are P.E.T. Pet is the word used in Quebec for fart. Translation "Little Fart."

• Trudeaumania: Name to describe the almost fanatical adoration and fervor for Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau during the 1968 Liberal leadership race.

• Tunagate: Another "gate." Also plainly known as the tainted tuna scandal of 1985 in which large quantities of possibly tainted tuna were sold to the public. See "Shawinigate" for note on other "gates."

• Whistle-stop tour: Name for Green Party leader Elizabeth May's choice of transportation during this election campaign: the energy-efficient train.

• Zoey: Official Conservative Party strategy nickname given to a type of female voter the party isn't wasting its time campaigning to this election, described as a hip urban woman who eats organic vegetables.

Is that enough inspiration? Think you can do better? Scroll down to the comment box and start posting!